The surface reflects uncertainty and would like for me to believe things are “uncomfortable” right now. In truth, my soul says these are some of the most “certain” present moments I may ever experience moments in your life, that it is possible for me to be comfortable during this chapter of my life, to put in the necessary energy when and where necessary as guided, but letting my God, my grandmother, and the rest of my angels take things from here.
Over the past week, I have awoken to true empowerment, to seeing what it’s like to live my life fearlessly and to know that my higher self, my inner child, and Spirit are telling me that “I’ve got this.” Leading into Thanksgiving, I am releasing the final energetic and surface components from who I was to where I am now. This decision may seem scary. The ego says “What if things don’t turn out the way you want?” Here’s the beautiful in it all: It’s no longer about how “I want” things to be, but the way God wants them to be…and for me to accept, from a true place of faith, trust, and inner knowing that whatever “that” might be is something that will nurture my soul beyond words and take my gratitude and appreciation for life onto a deeper level.
This time has been a while in the making. Many people have played their parts well, with three coming to mind in my flow of consciousness: Jennifer Kass, Nancy Levin, and Megan Hale. Know that when you surrender to love, when you know that you are enough, and when you know you can see everything that is meant for you before it’s been revealed on the surface that you can “jump.” Your new life, your life of empowerment, heaven on Earth, will appear. In fact, it already has.
I wanted to record this video for some time now, but the “timing” did not feel right. But, my soul now wishes to take flight. I chose to release/surrender all, forgive, let go, and now, I am truly moving forward. I’ve honestly wanted to fly for a while now, but I was afraid. Despite the fears and the vulnerabilities, I am now the butterfly.
I am now ready to share the observation of the latest chapter of my life, where the healing and unconditional love I always wanted was revealed in June, in an interesting and unique way: testicular cancer. Despite what your five senses tell you, you are right where you need to be. You’re still here for a reason. You’ve come thus far. Your miracle can and will happen. Do not give up. I did not. And now, I am healed.
I hope “My Empowering Miracle” heals, helps, inspires, or serves you in some way. If this video moves you, I also openly encourage you to share this video with someone you know who is going through a challenging time in their life. Remember, we are all just walking each other home.
Deep down, we all wish to love ourselves, to spend the necessary time to nurture our minds, bodies, and souls, to connect with our inner child that lies within, that only wants us to be present with him/her, to tune out the “noise” of the external world, and just be. Why is it then that many struggle with the journey of self-love. Why does forgiveness seem challenging at times, especially when we truly want to forgive deep down. How can a simple phrase like “letting go” give you an impression internally that you have to run a marathon of some kind in order to experience its freedom?
I have been blessed to have learned a great deal on my journey over the past several weeks, having had many of my own questions be answered through life lessons and through “digital downloads” from the Divine. I received guidance from my soul to head to London, Ontario during the Memorial Day weekend to see Anita Moorjani speak at her “Letting Go” self-love workshop at Centennial Hall. At first, I wondered why I was being shown to see Anita once again, especially since I had seen her previously just last March at Hay House‘s “I Can Do It” event in Toronto, Ontario, Canada. That answer would be revealed, just like all answers are in life, in divine timing. I had a strong feeling that I needed to not only hear the truth, but experience it firsthand.
You know that you are meant to do something important in your life, you may experience some form of noticeable resistance from your ego. There is no need to panic or be alarmed in any way. This is you stepping outside of your “comfort zone” and into the reality of where you are meant to be. If you are on the beginning of your spiritual path, then you may not clearly understand what I mean by “noticeable resistance from your ego.” If you remember the 80’s cult classic film “Say Anything,” the scene where Lloyd Dobler (played by John Cusack) is trying to get the attention of the girl of his dreams, Diane Court (played by Ione Skye), by awakening her from her slumber. How you ask? By holding his boombox (remember those?) over his head, blaring Peter Gabriel’s “In Your Eyes.” Imagine your presence as Diane. Imagine Lloyd’s boombox with the volume turned up all the way as your ego, trying to distract you from what you are in the currently in the present moment of. Just a little visual to simplify things.
So, yes, I was graciously presented the “noise” from my ego the day before the workshop and the morning of, in various forms: having to “get there” at a certain time, the fear of getting lost, and yes, my personal favorite, clock-watching when I was in the hot tub. Yes, one of the things I hope you learn from reading this blog is that it’s important for you to love all parts of yourself, including your ego, when it “goes John Cusack” on you. Even when you are in a hot tub on a relaxing weekend getaway.
When I arrived at Centennial Hall, I was surprised to see, to my delight, a very quaint and simple set-up for the event, with tables on the floor level of the hall, with seating for around 200 people. I then felt this would be a more intimate setting than that Anita’s keynote speech at the “I Can Do It” event, one that I would be able to resonate even stronger with my soul.
I knew I was not going to be disappointed in any way. How can you when you make an investment in your soul? The beautiful thing about Anita’s work is that she inspires you to feel what she has to say and let it connect with your heart, so that you can speak your truth from a vibrant place of love and gratitude.
Initially, my intention was to pen a blog about my entire weekend in London, but a miracle beyond anything I could put into words began taking form in my life, which I will share with you all very soon (again, when the Universe reveals the time). I was, instead, guided, to take what I learned from my time hearing and seeing in London, combined with the messages from Eckhart Tolle‘s “The Power of Now” (which was placed to me by the Divine at the exact moment it was needed) and my meditations, prayers, and my collections of present moments. And here, on the 7th of July (7.7: no coincidence), I find myself being guided to speak my truth in this form.
What I hope many of you take from reading this blog is that no matter what your five senses tell you, no matter your surroundings, your life situation, your health, or your finances, you CAN love yourself. When you make the decision to say those very words: “I Love Myself,” you single-handedly tell the Universe you are now ready to co-create your transformation. Simultaneously, you find the key to the “prison” you may find yourself in and begin to unlock the door, where your next steps will feel like your first, but filled with more freedom.
There were many times in my own life when I thought I did not matter. I struggled with my own unworthiness for many years, but made a commitment to myself on my self-love journey, knowing that the more I loved myself, the more I was compassionate to myself on all levels, that my worthiness would blossom, like a golden apple off of the tree of abundance. And guess what? That fruit has been and continues to be some of the most delicious “food” I have ever enjoyed and experienced. Your energy, your value is infinite. It’s priceless. That’s just how wonderful you are!
If you have difficulties in making decisions, forgiving yourself/someone else, and/or attracting the right people into your life, along with financial abundance, then you have more good news coming your way! When you take the time to love yourself more, whether it be through being in nature, getting a massage, sitting in silence, or drinking a green juice, the less you have to worry. It becomes easier to make decisions, to forgive yourself and those around you, and to attract the right relationships and money. Speaking openly, it is possible. On all fronts. Everything you see externally is a reflection of how you feel on the inside. The world around you is your mirror. If you believe that something is going to be difficult, then that’s what your experience will be. You are sending a message to the Divine, albeit maybe unconsciously. So, if you are navigating through your path and are not yet experiencing the results you wish to see, do not give up. Stay true to yourself. Stay true to your love. And be gentle on yourself. Remember: You are your best friend, not a doormat. You have a higher intelligence working with you. “Time” is on your side (perfect segway for Rod Stewart’s “Young Turks,” one of my favorite songs to listen to in meditation.
On this journey, you may feel like you are doing dancing between two worlds, one where you speak your truth and live it every day, the other where you want to “fit in.” You may have people in your life that are not yet ready to hear the truth. Several or all of those people may symbolize your paradigms of the past. You might get frustrated, angry, and/or confused, wondering why they don’t understand you and/or why they unconsciously misconstrue self-love as selfishness. Love them for who they are. Understand they are doing the best they can with the knowledge they have. Everything happens exactly the way it’s meant to. Trust in the process and know all of this is normal. The expression “practice makes perfect” rings true here. The more you practice loving yourself, the stronger you will feel: emotionally, mentally, physically, and spiritually. Your spiritual tools, your knowledge, and your intuition will all increase, not just for yourself, but for those whom you serve. With that being said, it’s very easy to place your full attention on where you want to be. Be present. Be in the now. You will appreciate life even more by being in each present moment of your path.
Rest in the fact that there’s no need to figure things out anymore. You are meant to do great things. You are beautiful. Give yourself a hug. In fact, give yourself several hugs during the day. One of the most amazing feelings you will ever have in your life is the day when you say to yourself: “There’s nothing wrong with me.” That happened to me in the month of June, where I realized that every part of me is divine and that I no longer need to experience my blessings and life lessons through unconscious pain and suffering. I wish, for you, that present moment is something you freeze in “time” and cherish forever.
The most vivid memory I recall from seeing Anita in London was her interaction with a woman in the audience who had cancer for little over two years. She was asking Anita for some feedback and advice, as her health was not where she wanted to be. Anita’s response to her was so profound: “Stop trying. Let go of working so hard. It’s happening.” When you shift your perspective and realize you don’t have to “do” anything, just be the love that you are, that’s when life reveals your own miracle.
My fellow empowered souls: It is happening for you. It is happening for all of us. Treasure your magnificence. You matter.
On the surface, May 2nd will always be an extremely sad day for myself and for everyone within my family. In reality, this day will always be a celebration of the life of John Sajecki, the day where my grandmother reunited with my grandmother for eternity in heaven.
This weekend, I take the time to treasure every memory that comes up today between myself and Dziadzia: Whether it be the time he took me on my 3rd grade field trip to the Arcade & Attica Railroad, the countless times he sewed and hemmed clothes for me growing up, the many holidays and birthdays we spent together that all seem to blend together now, and this memory in particular seen below, one of the last times I spent with my grandfather at his nursing home before his passing. I am forever grateful to my loving sister Christine for taking this picture of us and delivering it to me shortly after his passing.
I remember having some of the most deep and profound talks regarding life with him during his final months here in the physical realm. It was important to me to let him know not only how much he meant to me and to our entire family, but that he is love and that I truly loved him. There were conversations where very few words were spoken, only a look into each other’s eyes and a holding of hands, which allowed the flow of the Divine to express our appreciation, our gratitude, and our love more so than any words that William Shakespeare, Leo Tolstoy, and/or Ernest Hemingway ever penned collectively.
Dziadzia: I will fulfill the promise that I made to you, the events of which I know will be revealed in divine timing. I am honoring my promise that I made To Babcia as well, which is being revealed with each passing present moment. I am so grateful for our time we had together here, and I know the time will come where all of us will be reunited in paradise. But it is important for me to experience more of the paradise right here first. I am starting to truly feel comfortable in my own skin. I am beginning to see how important self-love is. I feel, in my heart, that I am becoming more grounded, which is now allowing me to help, inspire, and serve with authenticity and energy that is even more pure. Yes, there are lessons I am learning, which are essential to my soul’s growth, but I am also seeing and feeling how I can smile and be happy during this transformation. It goes back to where you and I spent the most time together: when I was a child. Reconnecting with my inner child is helping me realize how beautiful I am, while also allowing me to let each person I come into contact with just how magnificent they are too.
For the longest time, I was trying to “heal.” I was trying to “get rid of my pain.” If you have experienced grief or trauma of any kind, this may have been or currently be the case for you. My dear friend and teacher Jennifer Norton recently taught me that I do not have to wish your pain away, that you do not have to spend the time and energy wanting it to go away in the fashion we know so well. Instead, make a home for your pain. Allow it. Not as a permanent dwelling, of course, but simply as a structure for everything to pass on through. Feel what it is telling you. Let the energies flow. There is no need to chase or force these your feelings away. Just let the old, bound-up energy release from your mind and your body. All of this is simply looking to be accepted, to be acknowledged, and to be honored, so that it can shift and be transmuted into love. Pretty cool lesson during the time leading into a Full Moon, huh?
During the weekend, I will be thinking of both my immediate and extended family, in quiet prayer, during meditation. I hope all of them are finding comfort and peace within their own lives over this past year, while also taking the time to go within to find the treasure of love that they are. I hope my words, spoken through Spirit, bring all of you one step closer on your own journey. Together, we are all climbing on that heavenly spiral staircase. Aren’t we are all just walking each other home anyway? smile emoticon Live. Laugh. Love. #Namaste